A crotch cabaret at BISOUS

I can’t say I’ve ever seen a burlesque show before, but I definitely had something else in mind than last night’s performance(s) at BISOUS. 
Let’s first clarify that I wasn’t there to see the BISOUS girls at all, but a man called Russell Simmons, aka. the ‘godfather of hip hop’ and founder of Def Jam, who happened to be in town for Diamonds In The Sky, Hong Kong.
The event started out pretty cool with DJ Bravo spinning old skool hip hop tracks with videos projected onto the big screen, but before long, the curtains were drawn and out came the BISOUS gals.
Don’t get me wrong, the girls had great bodies, which is probably good enough for most, but something about the perfectly balanced girl group (1 brunette, 1 blonde, 1 black, 1 asian) just bothered me…
It started with some cheesy lip-synching, followed by an insane amount of crotch-flashing. What made it even more creepy was the overly ecstatic, plastered smiles on the girls’ heavily made up faces. And instead of being subtly seductive like I expected from burlesque dancers, the BISOUS gals strutted around the stage like horny peacocks, making shrill ‘YEOW!’ and ‘WOOPEE!’ sounds as they kicked their legs up behind their ears, did the cartwheels off one another and jumped up and landed in the splits (with a big THUD sound and collective “OUCH!!” from the audience).
During the totally cliche yet obligatory can-can dance, the girls lifted up and waved their frilly skirts around so much that I got tired of seeing all of them crotches, no matter which direction they kicked their legs out to make it look different each time. 
If you happened to miss out on the show, here are a few scenes from it that will forever be etched into my head (and now yours too, unfortunately):

Hope you enjoyed “the show”!!

Hong Kong Beggars: LKF Stump Fisted Beggar

Our latest beggar is the LKF Stump Fisted Beggar, commonly seen on stairways in and around Lan Kwai Fong. This includes the stairs leading up to the LKF Tower, the stairs going down from Yumla to Baby Buddha, and of course the stairs around the LKF public toilets.

As his name suggests, this beggar has no thumbs or fingers and usually looks gloomy and sad. He has a plastic cup pressed between his stumps for collecting spare change, and he’s also known for shaking his stump fist at you while you walk by. Once, he even used it to prod @mystifize, immediately putting her into turbo mode as she raced down the steps.

It’s unknown how much the LKF Stump Fisted Beggar manages to make each night, as I’ve never seen his cup even half full. Perhaps he would make more money by putting his stump fists into good use, such as becoming a masseuse, bread kneader or African drummer…

Xmas Eve Parties in Hong Kong

With such a “great nightlife”, you’d think it’d be easier to find out what’s happening on any given night here in HK, especially Christmas Eve and Day.


But after digging around, I managed to find a few confirmed party details for those who are interested:

Xmas Eve Rockin’ Party
DJ Thomas C & Leman on Club side
DJ Gruv & Yeodie on Lounge side
$500 for arrival between 10pm-12am
$300 for arrival after 12am
Open bar between 10pm-1am
On guestlist $300 (incl. 2 drinks)

Ministry of Sound presents Femi B
$200 (non-members)
108 Hollywood Road, Central

Beijing Club
Xmas Eve Snowy Party
2-8 Wellington St, Central

Xmas Eve Special – Countdown with Cash Prize
Xmas Day – Ladies Night Free cocktails and entry
3/F, The Galleria, 9 Queen’s Road Central

Xmas Eve Costume Party
3/F On Hing Building, 1-9 On Hing Terrace, Central

Unlimited Snow Queen Vodka and Standard Drinks
R&B/Hip Hop
Men: HK$450 and Ladies HK$350
Dress code: White
26/F, QRE Plaza, 202 Queen’s Road East, Wan Chai

In no way is this complete but there’s not really that much info out there! I’m guessing that the whole of Lan Kwai Fong is open for partying and for those who wanna wing it, I’m sure you’ll still have fun!

For those attempting to go to Lan Kwai Fong on Xmas and New Years Eve, they will be blocking off the areas (I assume) which is why there is this map available:
LKF Map (click to download)

Make sure you check out how to get in and out of the area as it’s sure to be packed!! Apparently there is no entry between 11pm and 1am on the 24th and 31st of Dec!