I always thought being a secretary
was pretty damn easy. All you have to do is answer the phone, order birthday cakes occasionally and watch YouTube (or YouKu) for the rest of the day.
I guess our secretary’s got it extra hard though because she also has to make sure we have enough drinking water in the office, which isn’t always the case. In fact, there’s already been two incidents when the water’s ran out, and wouldn’t be delivered for another few days.
Every time this happens, I’m quite annoyed since we already don’t have a pantry, fridge or tea lady to clean our mugs, but we should, at the very least, have a steady supply of water, right? Sure, I could go out and buy myself a bottle but that’s a) environmental UNfriendly
and b) a waste of my hard earned money!
Since I understand that not everyone in this world has a working brain, I’ve created a series of what I hope are easy to understand pictures to help our dear secretary know when to order water:
If there are two full bottles of water in addition to the one in the machine, there is NO NEED to order water yet.
If there is one full bottle of water and still some water left in the machine, make a mental note that you MAY need to order water soon whilst keeping one eye on the water level in the existing bottle.
If you have two empty bottles and a full bottle in the machine, it’s TIME to place an order for water. Yes, it may seem that there’s a lot of water left, but it’s 35+ freakin’ degrees outside and you’ve got a lot of sweaty, thirsty and parched workers in the office. So place the order NOW already!!
If every water bottle including the one in the machine is empty, you’re TOO F@#KING LATE! Once again, you have amazed us with your stupidity and lack of brain cells!!
I hope this is clear and helps all the secretaries out there. For more information, check out my book “7 Habits of Highly Brainless Secretaries” coming out this fall.